Tick – Tock

To many I am a distraction, one to blame for all that goes wrong in their lives. I lure them in with a promise of new hope and beginnings, like a siren calls to a lost sailor at sea. Lurking in the shadows of unfinished tasks and preying on eager and young minds, I am the thief of time. I am procrastination.

My name has been uttered many a times as an excuse for your obvious lack of time management and yet I constantly accept the brunt of your failures. One does not have to feel bad about giving in. Only the best have tried to resist me and only the best have failed, miserably, I might add.

Lately after much scrutiny and unsavoury comments, from your flawed kind, I have come to see the blatant error of my ways. In my sudden moment of self-actualisation, against my better nature I have decided to bless the human race with a few tips on how to avoid me. It will not be easy, I assure you. My powers of persuasion are not to be taken lightly, but there are a few ways to evade me, so read on if you dare.

You begin by a purging from any form of technology. With the age of technology upon you, my job has become exceedingly easy. Your incessant clicking upon a dimly lit screen, may momentarily bring you joy, but it is nothing is comparison to my permanent state of euphoria. With popcorn and coke in hand, I can sit back, relax and revel in my joy, as you refresh a page, despite better judgement.

However good technology may be as a procrastination agent, you must aim to acquire peace of mind. Think about what you would like to achieve and set time limits with indications of a task’s urgency. For instance number one on my list is to make sure you do not get around to doing number one on your list, until the very last moment.

Once the first two requirements have been met, you have reached a pinnacle moment, the last and final step: acceptance. Accept the fact that you have fallen into my trap and will remain there for as long as I see fit. I lied before; I promised you a way out, to remove me like a malignant tumour from your life. The truth is, I never leave you, and I just find ways to convince you that you are where you are meant to be. As a parting gift for having succeeded in my only goal, that being to watch you forget your actual purpose, I leave you with a word of advice: never trust me for I am the thief of time. I am procrastination.

Yep all the time

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